I am writing the
following article, because I have heard numerous people say this word. People that include friends, family,
students, parents, as well as other random people I pass by. I hold no personal offense or anger toward
the person who has used the word. I
understand what they are trying to say, and realize they lack the knowledge
behind the word, thus why they use it in the first place. My sole purpose of this article is to educate individuals why using the “R”
word is not okay. If, at any time, you
feel judged, that is not my intention.
However, if conviction leads to a change in vocabulary and language use,
then you will understand the purpose for this article.
So, what is the R word?
Retarded.
I often hear it in a context of describing
a certain action as stupid. I realize
that over time, certain words take on different meanings. We no longer use ‘gay’ to mean “happy”, but
to describe a sexual orientation; slang has changed the meaning of ‘sick’ and ‘bad’
to mean “cool” (though, personally, I could never understand why). However, to understand why using the word “retarded”
is offensive to those within the disability community, one must understand the
history behind the word.
Retarded comes from the musical term, “retardanto”,
which means “to slow down”. Which is
where we also get the term “retardant”, as something to slow down the burning
of a fire. The term ‘retarded’ was to describe
someone who’s learning processes are slower than that of their peers, due to,
primarily, an intellectual disability (ID).
These students took a long time to understand the processes of life patterns
and school formulas (simple tasks such as cleaning the kitchen, doing dishes,
learning how to read and do math problems), thus ‘retarded’.
What happened is, within my generation,
the term that once meant “slow” suddenly meant “stupid”.
“What that person did was retarded.” Translation:
what that person did was stupid.
Suddenly, within the disability community,
there were people who understood themselves to be slower (yet, able to achieve
major goals within their IEPs [individualized education plans – think of them
as specific lesson plans for kids with disabilities that inhibit their learning
processes]), were suddenly being called stupid.
Never mind that, for some people who have used the word, not toward
anyone with a disability, the effect was still the same. I imagine, however, that the word was perhaps
specifically used with persons of disabilities, at times, thus making the
offense deeper.
The effect then had an internal
expectation that those with ID could not achieve their goals. Note: whether this was explicitly stated or
not, this was what had been communicated.
This is such a disheartened feeling, and unrealistic, because the truth
is…as slow as any special education student (specifically, ID) may be, once
they get the pattern and understand the processes, there is NO GOING BACK. Perhaps some refreshers, but it’s hard for
them to forget once they completely remember.
These students work off routines, and when the routine of the tailored learning
has been achieved, it’s a GO! Thus, they
may be slow, but they are not stupid.
Perhaps, in reading this, you may think I
am over-analyzing or being too sensitive.
But, I know that if I were to use the N word, all readers would jump on
me, because I’m white. It’s not
appropriate. Look, certain words change
their meaning and purpose, however, there are some words in which that is not
conducive or able to be done. I don’t
care how many teen girls like to describe themselves as the B word, thinking
that they have a backbone and are cool; the fact that the very definition means
“a female dog’s whose only purpose is to have puppies” is enough of a motive
for me to tell these ladies to stop using that phrase.
Same goes for the R word. I ask you, coming from someone who’s lived
with a disability and is a Special Education teacher, if you mean to describe something
as stupid, then call it as such.
Stupid. Ignorant. Just please, not “retarded”. Individuals with ID have proven themselves
very capable, even if it means with assistance, and the use of the word only derogates
and discourages the purposes and accomplishments of these people.
Again, I hold no personal offense to you,
if you have used the word. My purpose
here is to only educate.
P.S.
The term “handicapped” is another former term to describe people with
any disability; whether it be physical or intellectual. The history behind that word was to describe
someone who had to beg for their wellbeing, because they could not provide for
themselves, yes, due to living with a disability. This is another term that would be preferably
phased out of our terminology. To this
day, I hear this term used, even by Special Education professionals; however,
it is not preferred. There are countless
individuals who live with a disability, yet, have achieved great
accomplishments. If you do intend to use
this word, please use this in a context of someone who is being enabled
(negatively) or not able to provide for themselves (in a specific manner).
